In reality rebound relationships rarely rack up. My ex husband was a rebound. Even knowing that, I didn’t think twice about taking up with the Wolf.
As hard as I tried to forget the Boy, remnants remained. Our song would come on, my heart would ache. I’d see someone that looked like him, my heart would skip a beat. My phone would ring and when it was finally was him my heart raced.
The Boy text me months after we split. I’d forgotten for a moment, that I had started a new life… And new romance. I contemplated what to write back. The Wolf walked by. Immediately, I told him about the text, not wanting to make waves. He said that he wanted to see if I was available for a hook-up. I was hurt by that. That was never the Boys and my relationship. Not wanting to look like a fool I told the Boy that I was fine. He text me several more times. Never once did I mention that I was in a new relationship. Maybe I secretly hoped he would say those magic words “I miss you, come back to me”. If he had, I would have left instantly. There was something between he and I, that I wasn’t ready to let go of.
One of the last texts I received from the Boy was when I was very pregnant. I still said nothing, no mention of my relationship or even the baby. I didn’t want to not hear from him again. In retrospect maybe I should feel some sort of guilt, the reality of it is, I don’t.
Months after the split with the Wolf, curiosity killed this cat. I reached out to the Boy. We danced nervously around the last three years, not wanting to give away too much. Both of us guarded, but still there was something lingering. I finally told him about the baby and my relationship. He said he knew. He congratulated me on both my new baby and new husband. I laughed, told him that there was no new husband and that I was single. We agreed to meet that night, mere hours after that text.
There he stood waiting for me. Time was more than kind to him. He looked older, his beard thicker, his sweet smile still remained the same. I walked up, reached out running my fingers through his beard as if no time had passed. I almost kissed him. I stopped myself. That same feeling washed over me, butterflies of anticipation. We hugged briefly, maybe I held on a little longer than I should have.
The next few hours we reminisced, he told me about his life, the love he fell into, the hurt of when it ended. As he sat there talking, I couldn’t help but feel for him. I watched him, I could see the hurt that she had caused him. In those moments I remembered how easy it was to just be with the Boy. There was not ulterior motives, there was no specific end goal, all there was, was the intention to have fun, love and be loved. Somewhere along the we lost that.
justbreatheitsonlylife 